Once you learn that you have herpes, you may be worried about how it will affect your sensual life. Maybe the first question you’ve asked yourself is, “How do I tell someone I have herpes?” or Is it possible to date with herpes? When you have herpes, you can still date. Moreover, you can have a healthy sensual life and a long-term relationship.  It’s just a matter of knowing the strategy. This article provides some information about herpes dating.

Herpes does not mean you can’t date.

When you were diagnosed with herpes, you may have been shocked to find out that it would stay with you for life. Therefore, you people shouldn’t worry about herpes dating. Moreover, you should always remember that your dating life isn’t over and your sensual life isn’t over. Millions of other people are going through exactly the same thing as you.

Herpes can be transmitted through both the mouth and the genital area. Genital herpes affects approximately 18% of adults. Adults are affected by oral herpes in 40-60% of cases. According to statistics, herpes is the most common infection in the world. Although millions of people are infected with this virus, they still engage in some discretion during their bedroom adventures.

You should disclose your herpes status to your partner.

You find that it is hard to start this, but it will become easier with time. Your partner and you need to disclose this information together, and it should not be delayed. Couples who are just starting out should disclose their sensual history and any sexually transmitted infections they may have had in the past or are suffering from before the clothes hit the floor. When you are speaking to others about your background, or asking them about theirs, it is normal for them to ask you about yours. 

When dating with herpes, follow these two rules:

  • It’s best to disclose your status immediately after having coitus.
  • If you’re hot and heavy with a new boyfriend, you shouldn’t disclose that you have herpes. You should never feel uncomfortable with your partner.

The best way to tell someone you have herpes

You can approach this conversation in many ways, but it’s important to plan what you intend to say in advance. Everyone has a unique way of disclosing information. It’s just a matter of finding yours. It is possible to disclose text messages or in person. Both ways are fine. The only things that matters are honesty and transparency.

The following is an example of a disclosure:

As a prerequisite to moving forward in a relationship, you need to tell your partner about your genital herpes. It rarely affects me, and the most recent flare-up I had occurred about nine months ago. I take suppressive therapy to keep my condition under control and reduce the risk of spreading it to others. If you decide to stay with me, we can be intimate in a way that minimizes your risks. It is actually harder to cope with the stigma than the virus itself. Moreover, you can ask me anything you want about it. It’s up to you whether or not you want to see me. To be honest, I just want to share this with you. The process may take some time for some people. Sometimes people reply, “Don’t worry.” In other words, they will be more cautious. It does not matter how transparent you are, people will appreciate it.

Everyone is prone to rejection in dating.

There is rejection in dating, whether you’re just dropping a couple of lines on Tinder or meeting up at a bar. You may be rejected if you put yourself out there. It will be hard for us to deal with rejection. In reality, it is not, and it can be painful. If you tell someone about your herpes and they don’t want to risk transmission, then they aren’t a good match for you. Okay, that’s fine.

Discuss this with your partners as early as possible. Learn how to manage herpes outbreaks and how to reduce transmission risks. If you do this, you will make your partner more comfortable. Don’t worry, you’ll find the one you’re looking for. There will be someone who can help you through this. It is possible that you may disclose the virus to someone who is preparing to reveal it to you.

Transmission risks between partners are reduced.

It is possible to have great coitus, fall in love, and lower your risk of contracting herpes simultaneously. All you need to do is follow the precautions prescribed by a physician.


Millions of people living with herpes in the world, dating with herpes, and enjoying their lives. In terms of herpes and dating, there is no mutually exclusive relationship. In fact, it’s the exact opposite. Moreover, herpes does not end your dating life. There is no need for herpes dating because, by considering all of your treatment options, taking all necessary precautions, and communicating upfront. It’s the only thing you can do. Once that is done, you can move forward with your life.

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